jokes

[fishypaul]

"Can I have some Irish Sausages, please?" asked the Irishman, walking
up to the counter. The assistant looked at him and asked: "Are you Irish?"

"If I had asked you for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was
Italian"? Demanded the Irishman indignantly.

"Or, if I asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was
German?"

Then, warming to his theme, he went on:
"Or if I asked you for a Kosher hot dog, would you ask me if I was
Jewish?

"Or, if I asked you for a taco, would you ask me if I was Mexican?
Would Ya? Would Ya?"

The assistant said: "Well no".

Suitably encouraged by the success of his logic, the Irishman steps it
up a gear.

"And if I asked you for frogs legs, would you ask me if I was French"?
"What about Danish Bacon, would you ask me if I was Danish?"

"Well no, I probably wouldn't," conceded the assistant.

So, now bursting with righteous indignation, the Irishman says, "Well,
all right then, why did you ask me if I'm Irish just because I asked
for Irish sausages?"






The assistant replied: "Because you're in f***ing Homebase!"

[Omahayank]

LOL.................................................. .................................................. .......................that would be a 'polack' joke here

[biggun]

Yeah!

[Banana Steve]

This apparently happened in the 1980’s I was told this story by a friend of my father who served in the Canadian coast guard, however the ships name I cannot remember so I have used artistic licence


One dark night in the north Atlantic, 50 miles of the Canadian coast, a radio message is transmitted.
“This is the Canadian coast guard, calling the ship bearing 6miles from this location over.”
“This is the United States Enterprise Aircraft carrier, how can we be of assistance”
“This is the Canadian coast guard, please be advised that you need to change direction to avoid collision”
“This is the United States Enterprise Aircraft carrier, No we will not change direction you will change direction to avoid the collision”
“This is the Canadian coast guard, be advised that you must change direction or there will be a serious collision.”
“This is the United States Enterprise Aircraft carrier, as we stated before, you must change direction as we are an aircraft carrier and we will continue on our heading, and as this US territorial waters you will change your direction do you understand, YOU WILL CHANGE YOUR Direction”
“This is the Canadian coast guard, we are a light house! Your call?

[Greenheart]

Nice one guys LMAO

[pingu]

excellant like them

[..::Pike Pirate::..]

Lmao "we are a lighthouse"

[Omahayank]

heard that one...dif ship every time....lol

[grinner]

did you hear about th dyslexic bank robber who tried to hold up a bank with a gnu

[wellyfish]

tahst nto fnuny..