| #81  07-25-2008, 07:00 AM | ||||
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| Re: jokes The Pearly Gates 40 Gypsies arrive at the Pearly Gates in their Transit vans and caravans. St Peter goes into the gatehouse and phones up God, saying. 'I've got 40 travellers here. Can I let them in?' God says 'We are over quota on Pikeys . Go out and tell them to choose between them which are the 12 most worthy, and I will let just the dozen in.' Less than a minute later St Peter is on the phone to God again. 'They've gone', he tells God. 'What?' says God, 'All 40 of them?' 'No, the gates'. __________________ 24 beers in a case and 24 hours in a day , Game on www.exmouthsaa.co.uk I have the body of a God, Pity its Buddha :-0     |
| #82 07-25-2008, 07:00 AM | ||||
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| Re: jokes An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution for a client who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed. As soon as he walked through the door at home, his wife started on him about, 'What time of night to be getting home is this? Where have you been?' 'Dinner is cold and I'm not reheating it'. And on and on and on. Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a shot of whiskey and headed off for a long hot soak in the bathtub, pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks as he drug himself up the stairs. While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife answered and was told that her husband's client, James Wright, had been granted a stay of execution after all. Wright would not be hanged tonight. Finally realizing what a terrible day he must have had, she decided to go upstairs and give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door, she was greeted by the sight of her husband, bent over naked, drying his legs and feet. 'They're not hanging Wright tonight,' she said. To which he whirled around and screamed, i know coat corner 'FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WOMAN, DON'T YOU EVER STOP?!' __________________ 24 beers in a case and 24 hours in a day , Game on www.exmouthsaa.co.uk I have the body of a God, Pity its Buddha :-0 |
| #83 07-25-2008, 07:28 AM | ||||
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| Re: jokes PMSL Dave, fantastic __________________ "The muscles of 20 men, and the brains of 20 mussels", |
| #84 07-25-2008, 09:06 PM | ||||
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| Re: jokes GR8!!!!! (o;(s __________________ A bad day fishing is better than a good day working! Fishing: if it were easy, it'd be called "Catching" http://www.flickr.com/photos/omahayank/sets/ Last edited by Omahayank; 07-25-2008 at 09:06 PM. Reason: face |
| #85 07-25-2008, 09:09 PM | ||||
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| Re: jokes What do you name a dog with no legs???? It doesn't matter...he won't come when you call!! __________________ A bad day fishing is better than a good day working! Fishing: if it were easy, it'd be called "Catching" http://www.flickr.com/photos/omahayank/sets/ |
| #86 08-29-2008, 10:26 PM | ||||
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| Re: jokes Was down fishing once, some fat lady came up to me giving me all the abusive stuff that fishing is bad, and what type of shit it can cause to the sea, so there's me clenching my teeth together thinking im going to lose my rag in a minute, so she keeps going on, so i turned round and told her to f**koff in which she refused to do, so then a few minutes later i turned around and shouted ''I Feel Sorry For Your Boyfriend'', with a red look on her face she stressfully said ''why is that'' and i said ''Because everytime u have F**king Sex, He burns his ass on the lightbulb'' its a bad one i know, but it shut her up and she steamed off angrily, lol cheers kris |
